You Just Might Be Sick...

It's Sunday (well, it's mostly gone now, but play along), it's summer and all signs point to sickness.  Not sure?  Well, let's look at the day, shall we?

 

The songleader asked everyone to stand this morning.  For two whole songs.  You suspect that he was actually trying to kill you, and it nearly worked.

 

Last week, you were a soprano.  This week?  A bass.

 

There may have been coughing.  Enough that people seated around you were foraging in their purses for TB masks.

 

The one member of the family you thought was completely healthy just exploded into a ginormous germs-everywhere sneeze.  Unfortunately for everyone, he was passing the collection plate at the time.  (You may want to consider witness protection when the epidemic wave of illness hits the entire right side of the church...)

 

You have no idea what you ate for lunch, but you've had 5 popsicles, because they made your throat feel better. That lasted for about 35 seconds.

 

You played the piano; you have no idea how it went, because you can't hear properly.  However, you strongly suspect that you may have just accidentally invented a new tempo for an old song. 

 

You're packing for a trip, and you keep re-checking each suitcase because you're bizarrely convinced that you didn't pack undies for anyone.

 

You have consumed a great deal of cough medicine.   Tons.   Enough to warrant a visit to an AA meeting.  You washed it all down with an extra pot of coffee, some hot tea and more cough medicine. 

 

You closed your eyes for prayer and woke up 15 minutes later.  In each service today.

 

There was a meeting.  You don't know what you said.  You also don't really know what anyone else said.  Hope it went well...

 

And last but not least: 

 

The congregation sang "We'll Work 'Til Jesus Comes", and you were quietly praying, "Lord Jesus, come quickly, because I'm too tired to work!"